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Daily Jane: Iowa Caucus Edition

Topic: Morning Jane | By Patricia Murphy | January 3, 2012

It’s finally here!  The Iowa caucuses – a contest that bears a startling resemblance to a high school election for class secretary between five kids whose dads work on Madison Avenue and one kid whose dad runs Madison Avenue.

If you live in Iowa and are still deciding about whether to caucus, check out your CJP registration directions HERE, your how-to-caucus guide HERE, and a few words from the top candidates to CJP about why you should vote for them.  See Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, Michele Bachmann, Rick Santorum’s daughter Elizabeth, and Newt Gingrich’s daughter, Jackie, all on the site below.

If you don’t live in Iowa, just be grateful that your hair looks so much better than CJP’s wind-ravaged tresses, and sit tight til it’s your turn to vote.  In the meantime,get ready to be the smartest girls at the salon today.  Here’s your Morning Jane…

They’re Off!  The Iowa Caucuses start at 8:00 EST, and a few presidential campaigns could wrap up right after that.   Look for Romney, Santorum and Paul to lock up the top three, with Ron Paul playing his wildcard– registering Democrats who love the feisty Texas enough to hang out with Republicans for the night.

*   Beans for Bachmann!   She may be last in the polls, but she’s tops in the coffee bean caucus in Iowa City, where diner patrons drop a bean for their favorite candidate.  The good news for Bachmann: She beat  all the GOP boys.  The bad news:  Barack Obama got more beans than all of them combined.

*  Next Stop Manchester?  New Hampshire is officially next on the calendar, but South Carolina is getting visits from several GOPers this week looking to woo the church crowd in S.C.  before going to the Granite State, where Mitt Romney has practically started counting the votes in his adopted state.

* Election Day in Egypt, too.  Iowas are the only ones casting their votes today.  Egypt holds its first elections since the ouster of Hosni Mubarack.  The Muslim Brotherhood has the ‘mo at the moment.  The New York Times has the deets.

Et Tu, Brad?  Speaking of existential dilemma, Rachel Zoe’s formerly fabulous assistant Brad Goreski launched his reality show this week, and we can’t help by feel betrayed Bravo making us choose between Rachel and Brad, who has been lured away from the family compound with promises of sweet riches and stardom.  Brad tells The Daily Beast his new book, Born to Be Brad,  is coming out soon, and we ask Bravo, “Are you happy now?”